Alexandru Bălănică - If you do good, you cannot stop

I am a former criminal investigation officer, currently a Cyber Security consultant and contractor. While there's much to say, I'm not here tonight to teach you how not to be a victim of a cyber attack, but to share a lesson with and about impact. About the impact each of us has on other people's lives. 

Over time I have come to understand that I can make an impact when I help those around me. That's how I feel something good is left behind, that's what fulfills me.

Since I became aware of this, I started practicing it often. I help people without possibilities, and anyone I feel needs me, until somewhere in my 20s, out of my desire to fulfill this ideal, I came very close to going to prison, charged with murder. Right. Murder.

The story begins on an October evening. I was in my dorm room at the Military Academy when a friend from Brasov called to tell me something. He told me that while he was out walking with other friends in the neighborhood, he noticed a man sleeping on a bench near where they usually sat. The man was neat, with a stroller next to him. He didn't look like a homeless man. They decided to go in with him. The man was reluctant at first, then told them that he had not been on the street long, and had come there because of personal problems. Every day he walked dozens of kilometres, notebook in hand, looking for a job. On the notebook he had written down addresses of companies he found in the newspaper or on advertising banners announcing that they were hiring. He told them how employers were pressuring him, mocking him, and even one of them told him they didn't hire homeless people. But he wouldn't give up. Impressed by the man's story, some of the guys mobilized, and the next day they sought him out, brought him food, clothes, and an old phone so he could call the ads, and so they could keep in touch with him.

When they called me, they were considering a much bolder idea, to take the man off the street, put him in a flat, find him a job, support him for a few months until he starts earning his own money, basically bring him back to life. But it's a bit hard to do for a few students with no income. But I went all-in, because I felt it would really make an impact. We went around the country and started looking for people willing to donate, money, food, anything. In just a few days, we were able to raise the money we needed to rent a studio apartment, where we moved him. I collected all the cans, butter and food left on the tables in the Academy's mess hall, and weekend after weekend we went to Brasov with bags full, enough to last him every week. In just a few days, our man had a house, he had clothes, he had food, and guess what, we managed to hire him to clean a supermarket. Two months later, he was maintaining himself, with us dropping by just to bring him another one, and see how he was doing.

All good .. what more! Until, a few days before Christmas, I was visiting him with a friend and found him upset. He told us that he had resigned because he could no longer continue there, his colleagues were making fun of him, calling him crazy, his bosses were overworking him. He wanted us to help him look for something else. While I explain to him that it was not a good decision, and that he is not in a position to quit his job, at least not until we find something else, the friend accompanying me notices some shopping on the table .. at least eccentric for our student lifestyle. Dates, organic honey, Nesquick cereal, almond milk and more.

Asked where he got them, the old man tells us that he bought them from his last salary, because he felt the need to eat more ... quality. The friend accompanying me, being more choleric, had an acid reaction, started to speak in a harsh tone, explaining that it is not normal, that it is a mockery of us, and that we can no longer support it, given the resignation, combined with those expensive purchases. My friend's reaction scared the hell out of him, at which point you could read on the man's face that something had ... activated. 

For a few seconds he was silent. Then he told us: you don't understand, I am not what you think, I am the second in power after Jesus Christ, but my mission on this earth is over, and now I must die. Take the knife off the table and kill me yourselves.

Then I had a shock. We freaked out for a moment, my friend said: he's crazy, let's go now. The old man complemented him: Yes, go away, I'll kill myself. As my friend left the studio, I had a brief moment of lucidity: I understood that the positive impact for which I was there suddenly turned into the death of a man, a death for which we were going to be responsible in one way or another.

We decided to stay, got into the man's game, and calmly asked him to tell us about his superpowers. At the same time, we called the police and ambulance. When they entered, the man wanted to throw himself out of the window. He was stopped. He was taken to the psychiatric ward, he was a nobody, with severe schizophrenia, but who was strongly activated by my friend's acid reaction.

After this happened, for a while I was shaken, I realized what could have happened if the man didn't tell us what he was up to, leave the studio, and stab himself.

But I will tell you honestly that I have never felt more meaningful and fulfilled until that moment, as I felt when I helped this man go from being a homeless man to an independent man.

It helped me to understand that although it can be hard, my goal is to make a positive impact in people's lives. Yes, it was a tough lesson, a first major failed project, but since then, my philosophy, whether we're talking about my personal or professional life, has been to make a positive impact. Sometimes projects pay off, sometimes they don't, but I know that perseverance will help me achieve my ideal.

I believe in the butterfly effect, and I know that a good deed done now, even if it may seem like a small thing, can have a major impact on the world sooner or later.

I believe that each of us can change lives, even with small gestures. I can tell you that there are so many poor children who strongly believe in Santa Claus, and Santa lets them down every year. I believe that the right gift at the right time can change the course of a child's life.

I can tell you that extremely many children from disadvantaged families drop out of school because they are bullied for not having new or clean clothes, no school supplies or a cool backpack to go to school. I believe that a cool backpack and some new clothes, which to us may seem like a bargain, given at the right time, can change the course of such a child's life.

I tell you these things because I live them year after year with them, because from the failed project I told you about, I continued, with small things, which I do regularly, reaching almost a thousand children helped by nice people, willing to do a good deed, children for whom I was Santa Claus, I brought clothes, school supplies, washing machines, connected their houses to electricity. Deeds that sooner or later, I am sure will have an effect. Maybe many will be failed projects, but I know that once and for all, I will make an impact.

This Christmas, together with Tonia, my colleague from LfJ who organizes a similar project, we joined forces and will go to over 100 children in Brasov with gifts and food for the holiday meal. 

If you scan the code behind me with your phone camera, you can leave us a message and this year we can be the intermediary between your good deed, and a child's wishes. Next year you can do it yourselves! Or through us!

I urge you to practice this, help people unconditionally, friends, family, strangers, the needy, give without being asked, even more so when asked, and think that a good deed done at the right time, for the right person, can change a life, or many lives.